So, what do you think?

(Uh-oh...I think this might be another soapbox moment.)

My sister has decided she wants to be a Stay-at-Home-Wife and her husband is totally on board with that. They are able to afford to have her stay home, if they cut back a little and they're both willing to do that. The problem (as she sees it): They have no kids. So, she feels she should be doing something valuable with her time and feels guilty for wanting to stay home. When we talked about this, so many things struck me at once that I had to ask you all your opinions.

1) Why isn't it valuable for someone (gender irrelevant here) to stay home and care for the home?

2) Isn't part of the problem with "home" these days is that no one has the time to care for it?

3) Doesn't everyone function better in a well-run home?

4) Why does she have to have children to make this choice more "legitimate"?

I've talked with Superman about this dilemma and we both agree that there is tremendous value in someone being home and actually, mindfully, caring for the home. I worked full-time for the first ten years of our marriage and I won't deny that there was a huge adjustment to be made when I came home full-time. It wasn't always easy, and like my sister I often wondered if I were not actually making a valuable contribution, but it was worth it. From being better organized and better fed, to being more self-sufficient and making a better use of the household's resources, we think there is tremendous value in having someone "managing" the home.

My sister and her husband moved into a new house in a new town in August or September and they both started working at new jobs immediately. Guess where all their energy and focus was directed? Not at home. Fast forward a few months and my sister had quit her job and run smack dab into the holidays. Guess where her focus was? Not really on her home...instead it was more on "pulling off the holidays when she felt like a crazy person". So, here we are in second week of February and she's begun to relax. She sees tons of things that need to be done in her house and actually starts thinking she can get them done. But, alas, then the ugly voice begins again: "You should do something important, something valuable. Go make some money instead of WASTING your time here."

When did having a well-run home become a waste of time? Or, even more absurd, when did it become accepted that she should be in charge of a well-run home and devoted to full-time employment? Why isn't being home, caring for your home and your community, an admirable pursuit?

Finally, why does she have to have children to want these things? No, I'm not being naive...I understand that many people think children are an "excuse" to stay home. No, they add a lot of work to the job of keeping a home running and many, many of us take years to figure out how to make it all work. I would have loved to have been home for a few years before I had children...instead, I did at-home training to learn to care for my home. It wasn't that long ago that no one would have expected her to go to work after she got married. (Yes, I know also that in many cases she wouldn't have been allowed to, but the point is, the time she would have been at home was considered too important to lose her contribution.)

Why would it be more legitimate for her to work full time for money she doesn't need, to buy things she doesn't need, so that she doesn't have time to care for and do the things she (and her husband) really want to do? When did this become the way things are done?

So, what do you think? Should my sister go back to work? Should she feel good about staying home and turning this new house into their home? What are your thoughts? Let me know...

The Last Batch of Valentine's Cards

Here is the last of the Valentine's Cards from the card swap. As you can see, all the cards I received in exchange for my cards were beautiful. I'm mailing cards today, so hopefully they'll arrive in time for Valentine's Day. (If not, they'll be a special treat in Tuesday's mail - remember, there is no mail on Monday.) I hope they've helped to put you in the Valentine's mood and inspired you to try your hand at something crafty, no matter how modest your efforts (trust me, mine were modest offerings!).

Traditional Beauty
This first card is Superman's Favorite. From the first moment he saw it, he just kept talking about how pretty it was. I think he likes the more traditional nature of it, but maybe I'm just putting words into his mouth. Anyway, the transparent ribbon adds the perfect touch of elegance to this traditional little card. It is not too much and not too little.

The funny thing? It turns out that we have these exact stamps, so now I have new inspiration to go with supplies I already have.

Shimmery Elegance
These little notecards are so beautiful in "real life". All the scrolls you see (forgive the weird camera angle, I was trying to get the scrolls to show without the flash wiping them out) are all shimmery metallic and the little heart shaped brad is just the right touch of "jewelry" to complement the silver ribbon. The Tiffany's blue cards are set off so well by the black frame highlighting the scrollwork. These cards are just perfect.
In addition to an understated Valentine's card, I think these cards would make awesome engagement cards, wedding cards, or just intimate notecards.

Absolutely Perfect
This last card is, I think, my favorite of the bunch (at least for this moment because I can't seem to make up my mind about any favorite for more than two minutes!). The raised lettering separated by little rhinestones is so tasteful. The contrasting red ribbon with the little charm hanging off the bow is so cute and the stamp art is so well done. Combine all that with the red, black and white color scheme and this card is just perfection, at least to me.
The sentiment on the inside of the card is not too mushy and not too silly. Again, I think it strikes just the right note: "Love puts the fun in together, the sad in apart, the hope in tomorrow, the joy in the heart." Seriously, what is not to love about this card. (I know, I said that about all of them...so sue me!)

None of the cards I've shown you today, however, are signed, so I have no idea who made them. I would love, love, love to say thank-you to the wonderful people who obviously put so much thought and hard work into these cards. While I was proud of my contributions to the card swap, it is obvious I have a lot to learn. I am humbled by the talent displayed by these cards.

Think Thrift Store shopping really isn't good enough?

I think it is time for you (and me) to think again! Look at how my dad and my step-mom decorated their condo in Mexico. This is their vacation/weekend home and they wanted to love it, but they didn't want to spend a ton of money on it. Over the past two years, my step-mom has been on a mission to make it feel "just so" and I think she's accomplished her goal. They made it look like this using ONLY stuff from thrift stores, consignment shops, yard sales, and estate sales. I mean it. Every stick of furniture, every accessory, every thing you see is "new to them" rather than "new". What struck me when I saw these pictures was how beautifully everything fits in their Mexican Casa theme. This doesn't scream "garage sale", either. Instead, it says, "Bienvenidos!" which is exactly what they wanted it to say.I need to be really honest here. I am very, very new to shopping this way. While I've always loved hand-me-downs, I've never gone out of my way to head to thrift stores, etc., to find the things I want.

Over the past few years, however, I've used eBay and Craig's List and gotten some clothes for my kids at thrift stores. While I don't need or want anything in the way of furniture, when I do, I'm definitely going to start haunting thrift stores, consignment shops, and the like to find what I want. The way I think of it, I know that I donate awesome, awesome stuff that I just don't need anymore, so why wouldn't I think other people would do the same thing!

Unfortunately, it seems I have only one problem...since they live 1300 miles from me, it is not going to easy to get my step-mom to help me in this process!

Believe it or not, I'm not really into...

"Hallmark" holidays, like Valentine's Day. Whether or not someone brings me flowers and candy or doesn't, is really irrelevant. Superman shows me loves me all year long and I would never be foolish enough to put too much stock into one manufactured day. Having said that, I have a ball creating things and all these "important" holidays are a terrific excuse to stretch my comfort zone and try new things. With that in mind, I fell in love with these Pottery Barn knock-offs that No Fuss Fabulous created. Click over to see their version. Aren't they terrific?

Of course, I had to try my hand a making some of my own. Since NFF had a tutorial, it was that much easier to convince myself I could do it. This is how far I've gotten so far. They aren't quite done: they still need the names attached and I need to actually make one for Charming, as he will be here Saturday morning, so I want him to have one, too. I also need to add velcro to the closure to hold them closed (the binder clips are helping the crease set until I have the velcro attached).


These will be on the back of their chairs at breakfast Valentine's Day. I'm having the kids make Valentine's for each other and will put them in these little envelopes and Superman and I have little trinkets to put in them, as well. I think they are just so fun. What do you think?

More of the Valentine's Cards from the swap...

Here are four more examples of the cards I received via the card swap. As you can see, every single card I received was absolutely gorgeous and I could not pick a favorite. So, in no particular order, look at these cards!

Understated Elegance
I have no idea who made these elegantly understated cards, but I wish you could see them in real life. I don't know if you can tell, but the card on the left has a torn paper strip on top of striped paper. The card maker used chalk (I think) to highlight the edges and it is just so beautiful. The card on the left is accented by a big button above these words "other things may change us...but we start and end with family". Isn't that an amazing saying? I just love it (and believe it.) The words both are done with rub-on letters.
If anyone knows who made these cards, please let me know. I would love to say thank-you...they are absolutely lovely.

Retro Cutie Pie
This little red combo is retro perfection. It was the work of Shean at Diary of an Unconscious Mind. It is an awesome combination of retro stickers, printed ribbon, and textured stickers, all accented by metallic gel pens all on a deep red background. The sentiment inside reads: "This Valentine is twined around with hopes that gladness will be found within the happy heart of you on this day and all days, too." Honestly, it is just a sweet confection and I know just who I'll be sending it to.
You don't think the fact that Shean's last name is Valentine has anything to do with her affinity to Valentine's Day, do you?

Notable Notecards
Look at these pretty little notecards. Don't they put you in the mood for spring? I honestly think I'll be saving these for springtime notes, rather than Valentine's. Again, unfortunately, I have no idea who made them, but they are gorgeous. What looks like line drawn flowers is actually a cool stamp. On the blue background, they remain uncolored, but on the little cards they've been filled in with water colors. They're both accented with ribbon and the purple card has little black brads on blue ribbon while the blue card has the addition of a gingham ribbon on top of the blue ribbon.
Since these notecards are blank on the inside, I'll have no problem using them however I choose. Again, if anyone knows who made these, please let me know, because I want to thank their creator.


Spring Fling
Finally, look at this card that we've dubbed "Spring Fling". Doesn't it just put you in the middle of a meadow in your mind? This card was made by Chermonblie at He calls her "Lemon Pie". She obviously had a ball making this card...it is just so joyful. You can't read it in the photo, but above the "grass" the saying is: "If I had a single flower for every time I think of you, I could walk in my garden forever. - Claudia Ghandi". Isn't that just so cool?


So, do you see why I said this card swap was an awesome thing? I think you should head on over to any of these blogs and check them out. While you're at it, check out Little Birdie Secrets to see all the neat ideas those little birdies have!

Brown Sugar Pound Cake and the Mixer has a name.

Okay, so I've been eagerly making new things (a new mixer wants to try new recipes, just in case you didn't know) and I tried a terrific recipe last night. Brown Sugar Pound Cake...doesn't that sound fabulous? I got this recipe from Elizabeth's Edible and you can find her post on it here. More good news? It originally came from Cooking Light magazine. How awesome is that?

This is a "grown-up cake" that is not too sweet. Superman and I both agree that would be perfect with a hot tea or a hot coffee. (T in NC, this is definitely a tea-time cake!) I can't decide if I should add a light icing or glaze the next time I make it...I'm leaning towards doing so, but we'll see. Make this cake if you want a not-to-sweet, but-just-right kind of cake. Because it is a pound cake, it is dense, so a little goes a long way...you feel like you really ate something. As you can tell, I really liked this cake. Let me know what you think of it...

Brown Sugar Pound Cake
(adapted from Cooking Light April 2000)

Cooking spray (for your pan)

3 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup butter (softened)
2 cups light brown sugar (packed)
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
3 eggs
1 cup fat-free milk
1 tablespoon powdered sugar (for top of cake)

Directions:

Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Spray bundt pan with cooking spray and set aside.

In medium bowl, combine flour, baking powder and salt. Whisk together well and set aside.

In mixer bowl, cream butter until light and fluffy, then gradually add brown sugar and vanilla. Add eggs, one at a time, mixing thoroughly after each one. Add half the flour mixture and mix, then add the milk and mix, and add the final half of the flour mixture and mix.

Spoon batter into the bundt pan and bake for 65 minutes or until toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Let cool ten minutes in pan and then flip out onto cooling rack.

Sprinkle with powdered sugar and serve.

Notes: I followed this recipe exactly and it turned out beautifully.


And, now, I know you've all been dying to know (okay, mildly curious, but still!):

Please welcome Minerva to the family! "Minnie" is her nickname already and we are thrilled to have her. Thanks to everyone who gave us hints as to her name, but she definitely perked up with momstheword's suggestion of Minerva. So, Minnie it is!

Valentine's Cards

I'm so excited! You might remember that I participated in the Valentine's Day card swap hosted by Little Birdie Secrets and I got my batch of cards yesterday. They are so pretty and so varied, I just love them. During the next few days, I'll show you the cards I received so you can see what clever ideas people have. Whenever possible, I'll include a link to the blog of the person who made the cards, but in some cases, they remained completely anonymous, so I have no way to say thank-you! That is really a shame, because these are some beautiful cards!

So, without further ado, here are some of the cards I received in exchange for the cards I made:

This one is by Sweet Pea and Beans Etsy Shop, where she sells stationery and invitations. Check her stuff out at: www.sweetpeaandbeans.etsy.com. I don't know if you can see it, but she sewed a fabric heart onto the cardstock on top of ribbon and netting. It is so pretty. I love the tropical print of the heart fabric and know just who I'm sending the card to. (If you don't feel like making your own cards, head over to her Etsy shop and pick up some of the stuff she's got ready for you.)


Here is Buttercup's favorite card. This one was made by Chris at This is Chris Now. I don't know where she found the time to make such beautiful cards - she has two teenagers and triplets! When you look inside, it says "Sweet", to complete the sentence started on the front of the card: "You Are So....Sweet". The center of the flower is a little brad and each one of the little circles on the green paper is accented with glitter. The sweet little ribbon on the bottom adds just the right touch to the whimsical papers she chose.

I loved this card. I don't know if you can tell, but the pink heart in the center of this card is like corrugated card board...it adds an awesome texture to the card, especially combined with the silky white ribbon and the glossy embossed "Celebrate" below. Both are raised off the card surface, for that three dimensional effect. Unfortunately, I have no idea who made this card, but I'm trying to find out, so I can say "thanks!".

The last card I'm showing you today was the favorite of the neighbor girls, who oooh'd and aaaah'd over all the cards as I pulled them out. The inside of the card reads "Love puts the fun in together." The decorated envelope was just perfect. Both were made by Tami at Heart and Rose and it is just so pretty. When I read Tami's blog, she admitted that she, too, stepped out of her comfort zone to do this swap (phew! I wasn't the only one!) I'd say she did a fabulous job. This card actually didn't photograph as beautifully as it looks in "real life" . The striped paper has a slightly metallic sheen to it, and the hearts are all on the foamy things that bring them away from the card's surface, adding more dimension that the camera picked up. Also, the little black heart has hand-applied red dots to its edges to add a little oomph. Finally, the tiny grosgrain ribbon is the perfect accent and keeps it from being too austere.

Aren't these cards just beautiful? I feel so blessed to have been part of this card swap. I'll show you more of the cards I received tomorrow, but I thought you'd love a peek now.

"Not Me" Monday, Menu Planning, and Cake!

Happy Monday! My cold is gone and I am ready for a terrific week!


"Not Me" Monday

McKMama at My Charming Kids does a thing called "Not Me" Monday, where we talk about things that we would never, ever have done. After this weekend, I decided I would have to participate, so here goes...

I did NOT drive two adorable little girls to Walgreen's and drive away with two little girls playing with Flarp (which, for those of you uninitiated, is fart noises in a can - you push your hand in this squishy stuff and the displaced air bubbles caused by that movement make fart noises, loud fart noises)--I would never have done that, even if they had spent their own money and I'd had nothing to do with it. Nope, not me. And, if even if I'd had a daughter whose Flarp didn't work, I would not have insisted Superman drive her back so she could exchange it for a working can. I definitely did NOT do that. I also didn't let Valiant shove money at Buttercup so he, too, could have Flarp (since she was going back anyway). I would never have condoned that! Nor would I have called Superman on his cell phone to pass along the message that one of the neighborhood dads called to say his boy needed an orange can of Flarp (as opposed to the pink and green that were also available) since everyone was buying out the Flarp supply at Walgreens. Finally, I did NOT tell Valiant to just call Charming (who was heading over for Game Night) to ask Charming to stop at Walgreens for yet another can of Flarp because somehow, even after all that, only four of the five kids involved had the requisite can of Flarp. Nor did Charming tell me that the man at Walgreens remembered his little sister in there buying Flarp and giggling up a storm with her friend. I was not involved with anything like that. So, to sum it all up, I did NOT have a house full of Flarp and, therefore, fart noises for Game Night. Not me!

I did NOT spill an entire 48 oz iced tea all over myself and my bed first thing Sunday morning. I would never have done something as stupid as that. Can imagine how terrible that would be? Why if I'd done that, I would have to wash the sheets (which had been changed Friday), the comforter, my nightgown, and an extra blanket. Not to mention just how cold iced tea would have felt running from my waist to my back and puddling under my backside! So, I definitely DID NOT spill an entire iced tea all over myself and my bed.

When Buttercup asking what was for lunch, I did NOT point her to the bag of Doritos on the kitchen counter. I would never do that, because that would not be a nutritious lunch for my child. Not me, I absolutely did NOT give my daughter Doritos for lunch at 3:30 p.m.! I also would never have let the same child play PacMan and Frogger on my Facebook account. (Nor did I tell Superman how to play PacMan, Donkey Kong, etc., on Facebook. As if he's not on the computer enough as it is!)

So, there you have it, my "Not Me" Monday post...I know none of you can imagine me doing any of those things, so I'm glad I got that cleared up.

Menu Planning

Here is this week's dinner menu. As I mentioned before, the menu does not have assigned days, but these are the things we will be having for dinner this week.

Ham Hocks and Beans (my dad's recipe...yum!)
Chicken Fajitas
Baked Potatoes with yummy toppings
Spaghetti with meat sauce
Cheeseburger Pie (from the Bisquick box--Buttercup's request)
Pizza
Leftovers Buffet - take whatever is left from all that food and call it dinner one more time!

If anyone wants any of the recipes for these things, just let me know and I'll post about them...I might post about them anyway, but this way you'll be certain to get any recipe you want.

and, finally, let them eat cake...

I needed to find something else to make that would give me a reason to use my new mixer, so I tried this Butterscotch Finger Cakes from Joe at Culinary in the Country. I honestly have no idea why they call it Finger Cakes, because it was just a 9 x 13 cake...no finger necessary. This cake was really good, receiving an "Oh, this really good" from Superman and a lot of "wows" from the kids. (Really, with results like that, how can your argue?)

Butterscotch Finger Cakes (Adapted from King Arthur Flour)

For the cake batter 2 1/2 cups cake flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup milk
16 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened (we only have salted, so that is what I used)
3/4 cup brown sugar, packed
1/2 cup granulated sugar
5 large eggs 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/4 teaspoon almond extract (I didn't include this - don't like almond)

For the frosting
1/3 cup butterscotch chips
8 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened and divided (again, I used salted)
1 1/2 cups confectioners' sugar, divided 1 tablespoon milk, if necessary

To prepare the cake batter
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

In a medium bowl, whisk together cake flour, baking powder and salt.

In a medium mixing bowl, beat together butter and sugars until light and fluffy. Beat in the eggs, one at a time, mixing until well combined after each. Mix in vanilla and almond extract. Mix in the dry ingredients, alternately with the milk, beginning and ending with the dry ingredients.

Scoop the batter into a 9" x 13" baking pan coated with nonstick spray - spread the top smooth with an offset spatula (I have no idea what that is!).

Place into the oven and bake until a toothpick placed in the center comes out mostly clean with a few moist crumbs attached, about 25 to 30 minutes. Remove from the oven and cool on a rack for 10 minutes.

Loosen cake from the sides of the pan and set a piece of parchment paper on top of the pan. Place a cooling rack on top of the parchment and pan - turn the cake out, remove the pan and let cake cool completely (do not flip cake top-side up).

To prepare the frosting In a microwave-safe bowl, add butterscotch chips and 4 tablespoons butter - heat on medium-low power until the butter melts. Stir until chip are completely melted and combined. In a large mixing bowl, add remaining 4 tablespoon butter and 3/4 cup confectioners' sugar - mix until smooth. Pour melted butter mixture and remaining confectioners' sugar - beat on medium-low until smooth. If the frosting looks too thick to spread, mix in the milk. Spread frosting evenly over the cake.

If you have a cake comb, use it to create the waves in the frosting on top. (Um, what is a cake comb?)

Makes 25 to 30 servings.

This was an easy "from scratch" cake...I thought it would be too sweet with the frosting including the butterscotch chips, but it was just right. (Also, if you wanted to frost the sides, you would need more frosting than the recipe makes.) It was both a kid and grown-up pleaser...this is another recipe I'll be making again, even if I don't know why they call it Butterscotch Finger Cakes.