Monday, February 1, 2010

Making Your Home Sing Monday...

My friend Mrs M. is married to an active duty military man. Her husband goes overseas a lot (at least in the time that I've known them)--a few times a year for 3-6 months at a time. When she heard Superman leaving five days after Mr. M was leaving, she went down a check list to make sure I knew to do certain things to make things easier during his absence. (Taking Superman's car off the insurance to save all that money - check; getting power of attorney - check.) She also promised me that it was only going to take two weeks before we got into a rhythm without Superman. I figured if she could say that in all confidence while her husband was leaving her with an 11-year old girl, a 9-year old boy, and a 5-week old boy, she must know what she was talking about. I'm glad I filed that away...I held onto it during the kids' meltdowns, the tough bedtimes, and learning to be a Skype-wife. Well, she was was two weeks on Friday and I can honestly say we've found our rhythm. After two weeks of processing and travel, Superman himself has settled into a work schedule a half a world away. We've been blessed to being doing this in a time of incredible technology...we can see each other almost every day! How crazy lucky are we?

As Making Your Home Sing Monday comes around again the Nagle family, near and far, is singing Don't Worry, Be Happy. We've stopped feeling sad and are feeling lucky again. We're settling into the new rhythm of our lives and it is a good one. With Superman settling into his job, we know when we can look forward to a Skype call and we're not afraid we'll miss him. Our school schedules are settling in, too.

Nan talks a lot about how our attitude as keeper of the home determines the quality of the experiences of everyone in the family and this past two weeks has been a reminder of this. Superman and I had many discussions before he accepted his overseas position. We knew it wouldn't be easy. We also knew however, that this was an opportunity he really wanted to pursue. Nobody made him take this job. This separation is not anything anybody did to us. This is a choice we made to further the long-term goals of our family. Making the choice meant we chose to accept the bad with the good.

The last two weeks have reminded us about all the blessings we have in our lives. All I can say is that the bad is just not too bad. Yes, Superman is out of the country for a year. Superman has a job he loves while so many people are struggling to find work. We have terrific neighbors. We live in a lovely home while so many people are struggling to hold on to their homes. We have an awesome family. We're all healthy and thriving while people are grappling with serious medical conditions. We just have so much going for us. How can we not be happy?

Sometimes you have to have patience to get to the other side. You have to have faith in the decisions you've already made and see them through. Just like the two weeks Mrs. M promised me, it all works out. You just have to remember just how lucky you are and be happy with where you are right this very instant.


Julie the Army Wife said...

This is so true. Yes it sucks that they have to be away from us but other than that my husband loves his job too. And I know it is what we are suppose to be doing. Good luck to you as you start this time away. Sounds like you are off to a good start :)

DarcyLee said...

I'm so glad you and your family found your rhythm. I knew you would and I know it won't be all daisies and roses all the time but God is good. I'm really glad to hear that things are going so well for you.

Andrea said...

I am still a work in progress when it comes to patience.

momstheword said...

I love what you said here: "Sometimes you have to have patience to get to the other side. You have to have faith in the decisions you've already made and see them through."

So often people make up their minds about something or give up before they've even given it a chance.

It is awesome that you can see and talk to one another! Kind of like the Jetson's, lol! Thanks for linking up today, my friend, and thank you for your sweet comments on my blog. Oh, and love the profile pic!

The Real Me! said...

Wow! Your positive attitude will definitely help you through this time and the advice from someone who has been there is priceless!
I hope that this year passes quickly for you as you are apart but slow enough to enjoy the good times!

Cheryl B. said...

Most of life has to do with perceptions. The thing we often forget is that we do have choices in what perception we take.

Seeings how this seperation is based on choices you had and made, it would definetly be anti fruitful to then take on negative perceptions.

I am not saying that "almost single parenting" is easy. Hardly!!! My husband averaged 80 hour weeks on a reg. basis between two jobs,and yet we still qualified as low income ....

But keep the whole package together and in a positive perspective will be the ticket to survival!!!

Thanks for stopping by my blog. Places like Target and Bed, Bath and Beyond carry Roasters. Othrewise, google search one like through a manufacturer - such as 'Rival'.

generationsgoneby said...

I think alot of it is attitude. I have a young military wife friend who isn't doing as well. Hubby been gone much longer. She's more in the blame everyone game. It's just making it hard on herself. You have to realize that this is your life and even if you were military and the miliray was "making you" you chose a miiitary career and you either love that job, or you need to do your assigned time and get out. Mrs. M has a great Military Mom attitude. She realizes that Mr. M loves what he does for our country. He makes her proud of who he is at the same time and she supports him by being strong, even when it isn't easy. She is the support staff of one of the strongest militaries in the world and she is the reason it is strong. Give her a great big hug. Mr. M and Superman couldn't do what they were doing if they thought their home fires weren't burning strong. Sure there will be times in the next year when you will read this post and say WHAT WAS I THINKING? Look at this post during those times and realize that those times will pass and you will be strong again.
Just think, soon two weeks will turn into a month, a month into a quarter, a quater into a half and then he'll be at the airport coming home.

Kathy C. said...

Erin, I'm so glad you had your friend to help you through this tough time. Getting all that "important stuff" taken care of, letting you know what to expect, and most of all being a great support system. Good friends are such a precious blessing! :)

Collette@Jesuslovesmums said...

Hi Erin! Thank you for your lovely comments about my quilting. It really encouraged me because I am so shy and unconfident about my work. I do enjoy it though!
You have a fantastic attitude with your husband being away. I read yesterday about choosing our attitudes and how we approach things and you and your family certainly have a positive attitude towards life! Skype is wonderful and I am glad you guys get to reconnect this way!
Lots of love
Collette xxxx

~Tami said...

It's easy to forget how blessed we are!