The Unvarnished Truth

When you make the decision to homeschool your children, there is one teeny-tiny little aspect of homeschooling that the other homeschoolers won't tell you. In fact, I've never heard it discussed amongst homeschooling parents. Ever. So, in an effort to aid any of you who might be considering homeschooling for your own little darlings or, better yet, to make those of you who are homeschooling realize you're not alone, I am going to share details of this never-discussed element of homeschooling here.

Are you ready?


Here goes: When you decide to homeschool, your children will see you for exactly who you are all of the time.


You won't get to run all your errands while your kids are in school and be ready and smiling with a plate of cookies and glass of milk when they walk in the door at 3:30 p.m. Your kids will be with you through it all.


Rude sales clerk? Your kids will be watching how you handle it.


Washing machine and dishwasher break in the same week? Your kids will be watching you handle it.


Procrastinating instead of cleaning the house, working in the yard, paying the bills, or prepping the curriculum? Your kids will be fully aware of what you're supposed to be doing instead of what you are doing.


So, what does this all mean? In my case, homeschooling my children has actually made me become more the person I like to think of myself as being. Why?


Well, we all know that we behave differently if someone who matters is watching, right? My kids' opinion of me matters. My children hold me accountable during those times when I might let myself slide. Since I'm teaching them to be discerning, respect and admiration have to be earned, that applies to me, too.  (Trust me, with an adult, a teen, and tween, I'm definitely answering for my actions.)

The unvarnished truth? It can be a total pain in the butt. You know those times that you want to chuck it all until later and throw yourself on the couch with a good book and some sinful snack? I can't do that unless I am willing to give them the same opportunity.


Imagine this conversation:

"Mom, what are you doing?" asks a child.

"I'm tired of housework...I'm just going to read this trashy romance novel (oops! I mean high-brow treatise on the government of Hungary prior to WWI) and eat some caramel corn." I whine in response to the question.

"Cool, I'll read a book about animals and share your caramel corn, okay?"


"No! You have important stuff to do. Fractions MATTER. You must stay focused and stay on task. Don't procrastinate just because you don't to do something. You'll be glad when you've conquered them." I respond loftily.


"Oh, so housework doesn't matter? Cool…I'll stop cleaning my room…" 


Think it couldn't happen? Oh, with my kids it definitely could. No question about it. I want the respect of my children and, yes, dare I say, their admiration. (They have mine.) The above scenario plays in my head whenever I have the urge to throw in the towel.  If I have to answer for my actions, I think it through a little more.

Still, there are those time I just want to stop for awhile.  (I know, I know, you can't relate.  Still, work with me here.)


I don't give in to the urge to throw myself on the couch without negotiating with them first:


"How about we work for another 45 minutes, then we all take a reading break?" I bribe, desperate to get some mental time-off.


"I don't have book! I finished my last one," plaintively cries a brown-eyed child. "We have to go to the library before we take a reading break! I can't NOT read."


"Okay, well, I have a bit more to do if we're going to head out. What if we work for another hour and fifteen minutes and then head to the library," I respond, already giving up the idea of NOT finishing the housework. I like the library. No, I love the library. Another half hour will have all my housework done and they'll have finished typing, spelling, and math.


Two hours later, we'll head to the library because I'll have gotten into the groove of my work (including math discussions and science discussions) and wouldn't want to stop when I was so close to being done and the kids will have finished all of their school work because they wouldn't want to stop so closely to be done. Fresh bread will be cooling on the counter (because if I had an hour and a half, I might as well make some loaves of bread). The kids will feel happy because they've finished their schoolwork for the day and I will feel happy because I crossed stuff off my list.


See what I mean? The kids made me do everything I wanted to do just by being there…and it happens like that every day! You need to be prepared for this phenomenon if you are considering homeschooling…it is a bit unnerving at first.


Oh, and the reading on the couch? It will happen in the evening after we get back from the library with a bag full of books and after we had fresh bread with our dinner. After all, I need that couch time.

Monday Musings - The Decision to Homeschool

The scariest thing I have ever done was NOT picking up and moving 1500 miles from a place where we'd been raised to a place where we knew no one. It wasn't marrying my husband a year-minus-day from the date of our first date. It wasn't having children. No, the scariest thing I've ever done was to decide to undertake homeschooling said children. Yep, that is the truth. Deciding that I was perfectly capable of providing my children with better than adequate early to middle education was the scariest thing I've ever done. When I homeschooled Charming, he was already middle-school-aged. I did it under the auspices of the local school district and I knew he'd be going back to high school. I just went ahead with the curriculum I was told to do. I was the quintessential substitute teacher and it was fine.  (It was more than fine...he's graduated from a four-year university and living on his own at 19!  Oh, and he actually likes his parents.  Obviously, I didn't mess him up too badly.)

Deciding to pull Valiant and Buttercup out of school meant that I'd be starting with younger children - Valiant had just finished 4th grade and Buttercup had just finished 1st grade. I wouldn't just be following along, I would be doing it all. That was and remains daunting. Can I really teach Valiant to write? What about Buttercup? Can I help her embrace her creative side without choking it with her desire for perfection? Obviously, I think the answers to those questions are "yes", but the truth is, I won't know for a few more years. By then, if I've messed up, they will be paying a tremendous price for my faith in myself, won't they?

This is our fifth year of homeschooling. Buttercup is now a sixth grader (by traditional measures) and Valiant is now an ninth grader. Has it been perfect? No, not even close. We've all had to learn new ways of communicating and getting along when things get strained and it hasn't always been easy or successful, but it has been worthwhile. Truthfully, even if they end up with an academic hole or blank, they've done what I'd hoped they'd do: they've embraced learning. They've become curious again. They are willing to dig, to search, and to question. To me, that is what education is all about.

(This post was originally published on the blog I shared with my sister in 2009 as we got to know each other after a lifetime on separate sides of the country...I've updated it for today's post.)

Shoot Me! 12 of 52...

Late posting, but for a good reason! Yesterday was Buttercup's 11th birthday and I was busy with her...glad to know I am getting better at leaving the technology alone and living my life. I did not neglect my Shoot Me post this week, however...

This is the view from my dad's new back yard. We've been heading over to his property to help with the various things he needs done before he arrives and Wednesday was so beautiful, I actually thought to bring my camera as well as the kids and the dogs.
This is me with the view behind me. If you look carefully, you can see Daisy in the right lense of my sunglasses and Lucy and Buttercup in the left.


How is this for homeschooling? Valiant was cheerfully doing his math workbook in the gazebo. I guess the world really is our classroom.


Finally, me with the kids...this was the best of the three shots we took...all of us cut off somehow.

There you have it...week 12 is put to bed! Yay, me! Head over to Carin's place and see what everyone else was doing this week. It is always a fun time.

Shoot Me! It's time to stop hiding behind that camera of yours. Your family is missing you in the picture. So it's time to post a picture of YOU (yes, you) every Thursday with your child, your spouse, your friend, your dog, or even by yourself. Just get in the picture, you'll be glad you did! And just jump in now with 1 of 52, you can do it!

Homeschooling Curriculum

One of the things that kept me busy last week was drawing up the curriculum for our first month of school. This is our fourth year of homeschooling and we've definitely had our ups and downs. My goal has always been to give my children an education that would challenge them, prepare them for college, and keep them interested in learning. I've stayed away from boxed curriculums because I find that one child might be "two grades" ahead in spelling, "right at grade level" for math, etc. Also, "grade level" is a subjective description and does not flow universally from one curriculum to the next. So, we've tried a lot of different programs with a lot of different styles over the years. This year, I think (she said, with fingers crossed) that we've got it dialed in.

Creating a curriculum that you've pieced together, however, takes a lot of time and energy. Doing a month of daily planning for two kids kept me away from the internet for much of last week, but it was definitely worth it. Based on our first day's experience, I think I'm right on the money this year. I think they'll be challenged but not overwhelmed, which is exactly what I was after. The great thing about homeschooling, however, is that if I need to change it, I can!

For fun, I thought I'd show you what Valiant is doing these days. This is his actual assignment sheet for Monday, 9/14/09. As you can see, because this week (Labor Day week) is a 4-day week, in order to stay on track, he'll be taking the Biology test from Chapter 2 on Monday morning, before he begins Chapter 3. Most of these first few chapters are review for him, so we're just getting test practice as much as anything else.

Math: Pre-Algebra – Chapter 8: Measuring Length: Lesson 55 - Making A Table - computer and workbook

Biology: Test from Chapter 2

Biology: Life Science – Chapter 3: Cell Processes – Section 1: Chemistry of Life. Read pages 64-73, then write and define the review vocabulary new vocabulary featured on page 66; write and answer all reading check questions found throughout the text; in writing, complete the self-check questions in the section review

Spelling: Wordly Wise 4 – Lesson 8 – Word List – study words and definitions – Write Each Word Once, plus do Exercise 8A – “Finding Meanings”

Writing: Read Harrison Bergeron by Kurt Vonnegut, write an essay choosing from writing prompts provided.

Typing: Mavis Beacon – 15 minutes

History: Story of the World – Volume 1: Ancient Times – Chapter 5– The First Sumerian Dictator– read section and answer worksheet questions.

For Math, we use Teaching Textbooks and I love it (we had good luck with Singapore Math in past years, but I wanted something more intense and independent for Valiant). For Biology, we're using the Life Science textbook by Glencoe (we've used Cyber Ed for years, but the Physics and Chemistry got too hard too fast for us). For History, this year we're using Story of the World for both kids, but I have also purchased textbooks for US History and the Constitution for Valiant to begin a unit on that (it is on hold for now...I want to see how our history program goes for a few months).

So, there you have it, in case you've ever wondered what we actually do as homeschoolers (and I know some of you have!), now you know! (And those of you who've been worried that I'm not pushing them enough can breathe a sigh of relief. Seriously. I'm pushing.)

Fascinating, isn't it?

Challenges as Homeschoolers

As you might be aware, we're a homeschooling family. We haven't always been, however, and my children have different goals for their homeschooling. Buttercup, at 10, sees herself going to traditional high school (at least at this point) and Valiant, at 13, has decided to skip high school completely and begin at the community college when he's 16. To that end, I think self-discipline and organization will be very important skills for them to have; Buttercup, because she intends to enter the institutional learning environment and she'll need to be able to respond to the demands that environment will make on her and Valiant because he'll be in an environment where no one will be checking up on his performance, his attendance, or his success. Working towards that end, I actually wrote down my schooling guidelines for them last week.

Yep, you read correctly, I wrote down my expectations and the consequences for failure to meet those expectations and we sat down and went over them, one-by-one, Monday night. So many people have the misguided notion that homeschoolers all have a laissez-faire attitude about schooling, I thought you'd like to see how our family approaches it. (Later today, I'll share a snippet of Valiant's curriculum - he's an 8th grader by traditional measures) For now, I thought you'd like to see my expectations for our school days:

1. The school day will begin at 9:00 a.m.
2. There will be no television or computer time before school or chores are finished.
3. Chores (including getting dressed and other personal hygiene chores) will be done before school work begins. Even Monday chores can be done before 9:00 a.m. if you focus. Failure to be ready for school on time will result in a ½ hour earlier bedtime that night.
4. Each day’s school work must be finished on the day it was assigned unless you are sick or excused (ahead of time) from completing that work on time. You will not be allowed to play until it is done.
5. Fighting, rudeness, or other attitude issues at the school desk or in the school room will result in revocation of play privileges for the day AND early bedtime.
6. We will not go to Museum Day if our school work is not completed before it is time to leave at 1:00 p.m.
7. When you are done with your assignments for the day, you will bring your completed assignments to me to be checked BEFORE you ask to play. If there is work to be corrected, it will be corrected before you head outside, upstairs, or whatever.
8. Assignments called “Reading” can be done at bedtime.
9. I know the neighborhood kids will have various days that are single days off or half days or whatever. Our schedule will not be affected by that because we take other vacations throughout the year that they don’t take. That means you will need to stick to your curriculum sheets and, if your friends have the day off, get your school work done early so you can join them.

...and you think your children have a mean teacher!

Today feels like a Monday...

After a three-day weekend that included a much anticipated birthday, today is definitely feeling like a Monday. The high point here is that Superman felt the same way, so I got two dates this week, rather than one! (For anyone who's counting, I've now had 16 Egg McMuffins in 2009--I've definitely slowed down since the January feasting!)

Since I homeschool Valiant and Buttercup, I've found Mondays can go one of two ways: 1) If everything stayed relatively calm and relaxed over the the weekend, the kids just sail into their school week; or 2) If everything stayed in a high state of chaos for the weekend (like with a much anticipated birthday), schooling barely gets started, as the chaos of the house must be put in order before their minds (and mine) can be calm and focused. Guess which kind of faux Monday we're having today?

So, while little schoolwork has been completed, the bathrooms are scrubbed, the bedrooms cleaned, Valentine's day decorations are removed, three loads of laundry have been done, Valiant (oops, excuse me!), the Red Fox and I have exercised, the dishwasher is unloaded, the furniture has been put back in position after some much needed carpet cleaning got done before bedtime last night, and we are all finding our groove.

Because it is, in fact, Tuesday, this is going to make for a tough week...I don't modify the weeks based on decisions like this...the schoolwork still gets done, just at a different pace. (No matter how busy Superman's weekend was, his work has to get done, so the kids might as well get used to those expectations for them now.)

Since I'm playing household clean-up, I though you might enjoy some interesting posts from some blogs I read. Go check out Lara's post at The Lazy Organizer...she's made some interesting changes in her diet and shares her results with us all. I admit to being intrigued. She's also the one who gave us all the link to this amazing (cautionary?) story about plastic from Discover Magazine's May 2009 issue: The Dirty Truth About Plastic. Pretty Organizer at Pretty Organized Palace has some terrific tips to get a lot done with minimal effort in this post. Finally, Mary at Owlhaven.net saw her first child married on Saturday and has a post about the clever things they did to make it special and frugal at the same time. The real value in the post, though, is the love you "hear" as you read her description of her daughter's wedding day. It will bring tears to your eyes (in a good way!).

For now I'll leave you all with that, while I continue to restore order and harmony to my home. (But I'll be back later tonight to show you Valiant's birthday cake...I tried something new and exciting and it actually turned out well!) Until then, have a terrific Tuesday-that-feels-like-a-Monday!

Baked Apple Doughnuts, random thoughts and a frugal Tip...

After the huge push yesterday to get my Valentine's cards in the mail, I spent today focused on cleaning up my craft area, cleaning my house, and homeschooling the kids. I wanted to get back to work my my Valentine's towels, but that didn't happen. (I would wager that spending time catching up on my blogs didn't help my sewing/crafting, but it was so fun!) After dinner, I did make these awesome Baked Apple Doughnuts (which are more like light muffins rather than doughnuts) that I found on Bunny's Warm Oven and they were awesome. (The recipe is at the end of this post.)

So, just in case you've ever wondered what the rest of my days (the non-crafting, non-cooking parts) are like, this is how my day went today:

3 hairbrushes and 2 children should NOT equal fighting over a hairbrush

d still equals rt (d=rt) and velocity is expressed in positive and negative numbers as a way of expressing relation to point of origin and speed is expressed in absolute value.

'45 x 3' is the same as '40 x 3 plus 5 x 3'. '50 x 3' is the same as 5 x 3 with a zero at the end!

Capitals, periods, and commas are a necessary part of any paragraph...always!

"beggar" ends with an "ar", NOT an "er", even though you think it sounds like it should be an "er" and "obnoxious" is a spelling word, not just a way to describe your little sister!

Laundry still doesn't fold itself, either (darn it!)...and my bread didn't turn out today. (It was very odd...it just didn't cook in the middle...I must have done something wrong, but I can't think what...oh, well.)Baked Apple Doughnuts:
A View of America

Ingredients:
1 1/2 cups flour
1 3/4 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon nutmeg (I substituted cinnamon)
1/3 cup sugar
1/3 cup shortening
1 egg, beaten
1/4 cup milk
1/2 cup grated unpeeled apple

Topping:
1/3 cup sugar
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 cup melted butter (to roll muffins in)

Directions:
(I did not read the directions completely before I made mine, so read the notes at the end.)

Sift first 4 ingredients and 1/3 cup sugar together in bowl. Cut in shortening until crumbly. Stir in egg, milk and apple, mixing well. Fill greased muffin cups 2/3 full. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes. Melt butter in small bowl. Mix 1/3 cup sugar and 1 tsp cinnamon in separate bowl.
Remove doughnuts from pan and roll in butter, then in sugar mixture and serve.

Notes: Okay, so I didn't read the directions well because I went at it completely differently (and more simply) and, fortunately, they turned out well. This is what I did. I mixed the flour, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon in one bowl and set aside. Then I mixed the sugar, egg, milk, and apple in another bowl, adding the shortening after the other stuff was mixed together. The shortening obviously didn't mix well, and that was fine. I then added the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients and I mixed just until it was all incorporated. (Wait, it gets even better.) Then, a la the Snickerdoodle muffins, I rolled the first few muffins in butter, then the sugar mixture, and then dumped them into the muffin tin. After three muffins, I caught my mistake and skipped those steps for the rest. So, I baked three muffins that had been baked AFTER being rolled in butter and the sugar mixture and the rest were straight dough that got rolled in butter and the sugar mixture after baking.

The result: both were really good. The butter-after-baking method adds a rich, buttery taste to the muffins and they were more "doughnut-like", but the butter-before-baking created a muffin that would save a little better and definitely serves more easily. The picture directly above the recipe is one of the butter-and-sugar-before-baking muffins and the picture at the top of the post is of the butter-and-sugar-after-baking muffins. Superman preferred the butter-after-baking, but I liked the butter-before-method. Definitely an either or proprosition. Either way, they were definitely a terrific muffin and great way to use apples that aren't so crisp anymore. So, let me know which method you follow if you try them.

And, finally, I'll leave you with a frugal tip. Stop using paper towels! In the Nagle house, we don't use paper towels except for when I fry foods and need them to soak up the grease, so I go through about 3-4 rolls a year - that's it.
So, stop using paper towels. I mean it. Just go to Target or Walmart and buy two 12 packs of cheapie wash cloths and use those instead, throwing them in the washer throughout your day...you don't care how they look, just that they get washed and ready for your next task. Seriously, this is awesome and can save you a ton of money. I keep mine in a basket under the sink and another basket upstairs. Currently, the 12 pack of wash cloths sat Target is $2.99...I always have about 24 wash cloths in rotation, so we're talking a whopping $6.00 investment. How much are you paying for paper towels...$1.50 a roll? Think about it. Assuming you only use a roll of paper towels a week (yeah, right), that is $1.50 x 52 or $78 a year (plus tax). ...and let's be real here, you know you use more than one roll a week, so you're looking at more than $100 a year on paper towels!

So, that is my frugal tip for today...I think I might start posting more frugal tips, what do you think?