Monday Musings...

When my sister and I were trying to get to know each other with a blog that both of us had to contribute to, we started Monday Musings as a way to share some random thoughts on just about anything. Our blog ended December 31, 2009 and, with it, so did Monday Musings. I've decided to start it up again. No rules, no guidelines, just my random thoughts...feel free to jump in...I'd love to hear your opinion.

Monday Musings...

My oldest child, Charming, is an adult with a life that is almost completely separate from mine. This means many of his friends are heading off in other directions. Today he told me that one of his friends is engaged. I loved hearing the news, but it made me wonder if I'd her the news when she got married or had her first child. I don't know her parents at all. We moved here when Charming was almost 15, so the play dates, school functions, and sports that bind us all together when our children are little aren't part of my life up here. My friends back in So Cal have kids the same age as Charming and we used to share the news of our children's lives, making each family part of the other family's journey. Now those children are starting their lives, too, but I don't hear about the little things...the things people think are too trivial to share. They would be wrong. I feel like I'm missing something by not being part of their stories. I don't hear about the boyfriends, the new jobs, or the other things that are important in their lives.

These kids/young adults have been important to my son and have often spent some time with our family. But, as is often the case, the kids come and go in each other's lives. Some passed through our lives barely notice, but some, however, stick with me. Maybe I know more about them, maybe they had a spark that caught my attention. For whatever reason, I think of them. I wonder about them. While I'm not invested in their lives, I truly wish them the best and love to hear news of those lives. It makes me feel weird to think that for some of these kids, I'll just never know more than I already now. Now Charming is getting ready to graduate from college and the stories of the kids he's gone to school with will fade, leaving me with new questions. Will the room-mate the girlfriend actually get married? Will the female friend go on to be a biologist (or whatever kind of biological scientist she's planning on being). What about the kids that are just phoning it in? Will they finally find their passion and go for it? The truth is, I probably won't ever know. The only chapter I'll get to read is the one in which their lives intersected ours. It feels like I don't get finish the book...to reach the happy ending I want for all of them.

They're at the beginning of some wonderful journeys and I'll not get to cheer them on. I think it makes me a little bit sad.

What do you think? Am I weird? Do you ever think about things like this?

Tuesday, Tuesday, Touch Your Shoe Day...

You know those days where everything is just humming along? Life is good. You're getting a lot done, your children are getting along, your husband is happily engrossed in his stuff...you know the kind, right?

Sunday was one of those days. We didn't go to the gym at dark o'clock (yeah, me!) and I woke up at the oh-so-late hour of 8:30 a.m. and couldn't decide what to make the family. After much dithering, I decided to seize the day! I got out of bed and headed downstairs and made blueberry muffins (I'll post the recipe this week - they are fabulous) to accompany the eggs and Spam (Superman LOVES Spam) I also made. I got a load of laundry in the washer first thing, too. My energy was infectious and everyone decided to have a terrific day. After breakfast was cleared and the dishes were done, I decided to do a little more baking, so...

I made these chocolate chip banana muffins, a loaf of banana oatmeal bread, and a loaf of white bread. I transferred the laundry from the washer to the dryer, too. Then I headed upstairs to take a shower, get dressed, make our bed, and generally tidy the upstairs.

When Superman and the kids were done washing the car (it is a BIG car!), I called them in for a late lunch of grilled-cheese sandwiches on fresh white bread, which used up the white bread, so I made a second loaf of white bread.

Then the neighbors, the same ones who kindly hosted Game Night Saturday night, wanted to know "what we're doing for dinner?". Well, a quick survey concluded that the Nagle5 weren't hungry for dinner...the lunch had been late and filling. Still, the neighbors wanted to have an impromptu card game "after dinner", so we agreedthey'd head on over after they ate dinner and I made this cinnamon roll cake for dessert. (See what I mean? I was on a roll...baking, baking, baking!)

Before I headed up to bed, I pulled out the laundry I'd started in the morning and folded it and discovered...

...that Superman had left a pen in his pocket. The day, however, was wonderful enough that I shrugged and said, "At least it was one of the napkins I don't like and Buttercup's pajama pants can become capri-length pajama pants." No big deal.

All in all, a good day. Don't you just love days like that?

Monday Musings from a Troubled Mind

Well, you might have noticed that I haven't posted here since Friday and now it is Monday evening and I'm not in the right frame of mind to participate in Making Your Home Sing Monday. I could blame my technology troubles, but I could have used one of the other computers if I'd been of a mind to post. The truth is, I didn't want to post. I'm grappling with some troubling issues that I won't/can't share with you all because there is no way to put them out here for discussion without compromising the privacy of other people. (Outing myself is one thing, outing someone else is not cool!)

Isn't it difficult to reconcile how you'd like things to be with how things just "are"? Sometimes it is so difficult to recognize that no matter how strong your will, no matter how dedicated you are, you just can't change some things. It is so difficult to watch people you care about behave in ways that are not going to get them the things they want, even as they stubbornly refuse to alter course. It is so clear that what we do says more about who we are than who we say we are. Sigh...no simple answers...now I'd just like some peace in my mind.




Anyway, this is my friend "A" (in the pink shorts) getting ready to cross the finish line for the LA Marathon last week--this year was her third marathon (her fourth one?) and I think she is amazing. I don't care what her time was. Years ago, we both talked about how cool it would be to run the marathon and that it would be even more cool to do it before we turned 40. Well, she did it when she was 39 (I think!), but I never did. Why? Because she wanted it more than I did. It is that simple. She was willing to put in the road work, deal with the hours of pain, the injuries, etc. and I wasn't willing to give up the things I would have to in order to do that. So, when I say I'd love to run the marathon and I never have, that really means "I don't want it more than I want to bake and sew and homeschool and garden". Likewise, when she says she'd like to bake more, she means "she'd like to bake, but not more than she'd like to run the marathon". I am in awe of her accomplishments, even as I celebrate my own. Taking ownership of our choices is one of the most difficult lessons we learn and it seems to be a difficult one to pass along, too. I celebrate A's recent victory...I'm so proud of her.

Making Your Home Sing Monday is still going on and everybody has some really good thoughts. Nan is actually joining the Five Moms in a Summer Cleaning Frenzy. Um, I'll pass (but I'll be watching the rest of them work up a sweat as they clean their houses from top to bottom). Head on over to Momstheword to see what else is going on this first week of June.